Today is the beginning of my 30th year on this earth. As much as I act like the grandpa in my group of friends (even when I’m the youngest), it’s still mind-boggling to think that I’ve been on this earth for nearly 3 decades.
I could fill up hundreds of novels detailing my experiences and the lessons I’ve learned in my lifetime, but the main 3 points I can take away from this milestone are as follows:
1. Life gets better, but only if you allow it.
While I was extremely blessed as a child, there were times when I felt like giving up. I was a victim of severe psychological (and sometimes physical) bullying in my formative years, mostly because I grew up a nerd in the hood. In addition, there were pressures from home to excel in academics and athletics in order to avoid being a product of my environment: the Far South Side of Chicago. These two combined helped feed a really bad temper, which surprises most of my friends due to how calm I am now.
When faced with adversity, the easiest route is to perpetuate the negativity. Yet, the only thing this does is spoil every other area of your life. Instead, its better to channel that energy into something productive. For me, that was art: band, drama, drawing, short films, and more. Without these outlets, I’d likely be in prison or dead.
There have been several bumps in the road, some that I’ve brought on myself and some that have been tossed my way by life. No matter how low I feel at times or how badly I mess up, I hold onto the faith that things will get better with time. My faith in God is a big part of this mindset, but also because I had a praying Mother who saw how much I struggled as a child.
To those who are struggling in one or more areas in life, take it from someone who has survived some really dark places: it gets better, but only if you let it. If you choose to wallow in self-pity, you will dig yourself in deeper and deeper.
The only way out of your storm is to walk through it.
2. Perspective is everything.
A lot of times we will look at a problem on the surface and attempt to solve it with a very small frame of reference. However, the best way to attack an issue is to stand back and analyze the situation as a whole.
You are in control of how you see the world. You may have been conditioned to see life in a certain way, but you don’t have to maintain that way of thought. It takes work to reprogram your brain to see the positive in any situation (and this growth usually happens in some pretty dark times) but it’s worth it in the end.
3. God is in control. I am just a vessel.
I’d had all these ideas and preconceived notions about life and my career when I moved to LA just weeks after my 22nd birthday, and to be completely honest, none of them really came true. However, I am 100% sure that I am happier where I am now than I would have been if things had gone my way. I can only thank God for that.
I grew up in the church and had heard all the bible stories, but never really knew God. It took me moving to California and leaving everything I knew behind in order to find Him. Reintroducing myself to the Word gave me clarity on my true purpose in life: to be a vessel for God to use my experiences and knowledge to help others in their lives. Sometimes that’s through a song I’ve written or a random conversation, but nevertheless my heart smiles when I see someone walking in their purpose and knowing that God allowed me the privilege of helping.
So here’s to 29! I pray for a year of spiritual and mental growth, clarity, stronger relationships with family and friends (hopefully including my future wife, whoever that may be), and continued blessings.
